And suddenly, she was ashamed...
Ashamed for having betrayed the fortress that she made for herself when she promised it would never happen again!
And she felt small for hasn’t realized that she was not welcome anymore…that her love was too much in that moment. But she also thought if there was a right moment to feel that love.
And she became sad when she noticed that even if the whole world was telling her that it was insane, cruel to herself, and that she would be alone on that decision; the only absence that could let her down that way was not the whole world’s absence…it was his…
And again, she was ashamed… for not being as adult as she thought she would be when necessary. She realized that it was so real, so “touchable”, that even now, she was waiting for something that she does not know what it is…
She remembered that she never cared about people’s opinion, that she was used to make her own way, always. But even when she’s building her way right now, she’s ashamed…
For willing to apologize, and does not know what for…
For moving on loving, knowing that she’s on her own…
For feeling guilty, of disturbing something bigger and more important than what she is feeling now…
Nor for not knowing what to say when people ask things…but for not knowing what answer to herself when she look into the mirror…
Maybe a little bit stupid for not understanding,
And then, something inside her…deep inside…told…
“Love is let go…even when both of them wanna stay”
Of course she doesn’t agree…or this would be someone else’s blog…
